In June of 2012 I went to a friend’s house for coffee. I had just had my fourth baby, a boy, in May. I love this friend, and I don’t see her very regularly, but when we get together we have a ton of stuff to talk about. That day she told me about a program she saw an infomercial about on TV called Insanity. I had never heard of it…
I went home that day and watched the informercial on my phone while I nursed my son. It looked pretty crazy. When I spoke to my friend again, I said, “That looks amazing. I just don’t think I could ever do it.” And I believed that. I had never done a pushup outside of a physical fitness test. I may not have even known what a burpee was at the time. I went on with my summer.
It was a fun summer, I’m sure. But there was a growing uneasiness inside me. I had gotten “almost fit” before my fourth with a brief stint of running. But I was feeling very heavy, very uncomfortable in my own skin. My husband has a quote I love: “It’s hard to get out of bed when your pants don’t fit.” And that is so true! All vanity aside, this is the body we live in and spend the day in and we have to clothe it and when we can’t do that comfortably it just sucks. I felt out of control, weak, helpless, unhealthy.
That September, my birth month, I just did it- I ordered Insanity. It was somewhat impulsive, but I feel like it had been floating around in my head since June. It was a lot of money for us; money is tight with me staying at home and I probably had no business spending $120 on a fitness program. But I did it. And I tracked the shipping every single day.
When it arrived I took the fit test. I almost threw up. That would happen again a few times that week. And throughout the program. I also cried a few times. But I stuck with it and I somehow loved it. I loved the craziness of it. I loved what I was doing with my body. I loved pushing myself to the point of tears. I loved the challenge and the sense of accomplishment that came after. And I saw results. Pretty quickly. I saw improvements in what I was doing, and I saw changes in my body. That was very satisfying. When I saw friends at Thanksgiving that I hadn’t seen since Labor Day, it was an almost jaw-dropping reaction. All of this was good for my self-esteem, my confidence. I also started to thrive on the joy you get from exercise- the endorphins, the good feelings it generates, the improvement in your mood. I became a better mother- I was happier, more fun. I had more energy and more patience because I was becoming more at peace with myself. I felt better, so my mood was better, so I treated those around me better.
I also loved the example I was setting for my kids. They watched me a lot in those days; we only have one TV in our house. They watched me sweat and struggle and push through and finish and feel proud. I think those were good lessons for physical challenges and any other challenge. I was proud of myself.
I would go on to do Insanity again, and then I tried other Beachbody programs. I joined a Facebook accountability group (grudgingly) and was surprised by how much I liked the sharing and the support. I have loved every program I have done- Insanity, T25, Insanity: The Asylum, P90X3, PiYo, Chalene Extreme, 21 Day Fix, 21 Day Fix Extreme, Insanity Max 30. They are all motivating and they give you results. The variety is great, but you know you’re gonna see progress. My body is completely different than it ever was; I used to wonder if you could change your body and I have learned that you can!
I have learned a ton about nutrition and clean eating with the programs. And I continue to grow…I have a lot of fitness goals yet to meet. I need to work on some issues. I want to do a pull-up, unassisted. Pushups drive me crazy; I want to be able to bang out 20 pushups no problem. I still have a sweet tooth that pops up unexpectedly and won’t go away. But my pants fit. It is much easier to get out of bed when your pants fit, when you don’t feel like you’re expanding like a balloon.
There is a particular moment that sticks out in my mind from years ago…I was on a canoe trip. It was one of the funnest days ever. I had a great time. But I remember being in the water, with clothes on and a life vest, and having to climb back into the canoe. I couldn’t do it. I felt like a beached whale (I wasn’t particularly heavy at the time- just totally out of shape) and I couldn’t do it. I shrugged it off and somehow got back in and had fun the rest of the day. But I was struck by that feeling of not being able to haul my fat self back into the canoe.
I think part of the success I’ve had the last three years has been because of a shift in goals…yes, I would like to be thin and to wear clothes that fit nice and look good. But I mostly want to be strong, to be fit, to be healthy. I want to set goals for myself and meet them; I want to do things I thought I could never do.
I have become passionate about health and fitness and nutrition and it was three years of loving Beachbody that finally got me to become a coach. I wanted to add Shakeology to my life, too, and knew the discount would help out there. So I signed up…and I love the added motivation and accountability that being a coach brings. I love seeing it change other peoples’ lives that way it has changed mine. I get downright mushy about it, because it has genuinely changed every part of my life. And all for the good.